Troubles with character description? Here are some tools.

Many first time authors have difficulties to describe their characters. Today, I'd like to get into the looks. Though many don't think a description is necessary, I love to give the reader an idea of what colour the hair, the eyes of my MCs are. How they dress and that all, if possible, quite detailed. What I read a lot in first time novels is a so called info dump: she was beautiful, had long black hair, blue eyes, had a slim figure and was tall. Though it isn't wrong, it's a rather boring list. It can be brought across wonderfully. And it doesn't have to be all in one go, it can be dropped whenever it's appropriate. You could have one character say to the other at the very end of the book," You know, I've never noticed you had such delicate hands, how come I missed that?"

Example 1: She was beautiful. 
He loved her fine features, the cheekbones, her fair skin -- if he wouldn't know better, he would think she's a model.
She's so beautiful, he thought, how will I ever plug up the courage to talk to her?
"Yeah, but you are beautiful, unlike me," she said.

Example 2: She had long black hair.
Without a further word, she briskly turned around, sending her long black hair flying through the air.
She watched herself in the mirror, all her life she'd worn her black her long, now it's time for a change.
He hunched over the painting, holding back his long black hair.
All she could see from the back was his long black hair.
She tied her long black hair into a pony tail and sighed.
"You will see," she said, blowing a lock of her long black hair out of the face. (Or flick it back.)

Example 3: He had blue eyes.
She couldn't stop staring into his amazing blue eyes.
How can someone have such blue eyes? she wondered.
"The blue of my eyes even changes according to my mood," he said.
"I wished I had your blue eyes instead of boring brown."

Example 4: She was slim and tall.
I wonder if she's a model, he thought, wouldn't be surprise with that figure.
"She must be a size 10," she said, throwing a jealous look at the girl, "and she's even taller than me on high heels."
He looked at her another time; she must be at least a foot taller than most of the girls here.
"That red dress really compliments your slim figure," he said.

Of course, my examples don't really work with every context, but often it's quite easy to incorporate some flow into the description. Her full lips parted in a smile, his blue eyes were wide as saucers, her slim figure suggested she's into sports, etc. Again, play around a bit ;-)

Oi, indie author, can I have a word, please?

Okay, now that you're here I have a bone to pick with you. Take a seat and listen.

You see, I do love you and I do want to support you and I certainly don't mind to connect with you, or have fun on the forum, twitter or facebook with you, but, and you knew there's going to be a but, didn't you? Yes, there's a big but and I will soon shed some light over the but to make it look a bit more like a but. Well, what I want to say is that although I understand your need to promote your book, to shout it from the roof tops, through a megaphone, even amplified if needed, and I know that you're proud of it, and so glad it's available for others to order and read, to scribble notes, to dog-ear, to bend, to keep it for themselves or rave about it to others, yes, I'm sure you've considered all those options already, what I finally want to say is that I cannot and will not understand why you would come onto my threads where I plug my book, shout from roof tops, in hope it's going to be heard by readers, so that their interest is piqued and they feel like they want to click the link I've provided in order to read more, download a sample, perhaps the whole book, to read it, to enjoy it, to dog-ear it, to laugh, to cry, to recommend; I wonder why you would come onto my thread to tell me, proud like a child who did its first drawing, showing it to its mother, that you have 'liked' my book on amazon, which leaves me with the feeling I have to return a favour, which, quite frankly, I don't want to return, not out of cruelness, but out of principle, because, if I'm honest, to me, it sounds a little desperate, especially, and I mean this in all honesty, when you whack a hint as heavy as a concrete pole over my head, and by that I mean you (un)subtly let me know that you're going to check out my humble writings, which, as you will understand, I certainly very much appreciate, even be thankful for, if it wasn't for the fact that, whilst letting me know, you're leaving a big fat link to your own work, which, of course, you expect me to look at, on my thread to plug my book, to plug your own book, uninvited. You see, I find this rather off-putting and, by doing what you're doing, please see, I feel I need to make you aware of it, you will most likely achieve quite the contrary. I, for once, am against swap buying, as well as review exchange, plus, and that's the most important reason, I am, and I'm sure so are you, able to click on names on threads and when you, being just yourself, having a good conversation with me, on the forum, twitter or facebook and you write in a genre I like, you will most likely be surprised that suddenly, there will be a new review for your book, that is, if I like what I read.


That's all I had to say, you're now free to leave and write a thousand times: I will not plug my book on Stella's threads again.

:-)

How to inject emotions without looking like a beginner

A friend of mine recently forwarded a rejection letter he received for one of his books. The agent's reason was that the book lacked emotions, something I've been telling him for a while, but he didn't want to listen, so he learned the hard way.

I told him to get a huge syringe of emotions and inject it into the writing and scenes where needed. His answer was that he then would have to use adverbs a lot and he didn't want that. This got me thinking. Do writer really think that using adverbs are the only way to showcase emotions? Personally, I don't use them a lot and still manage to bring emotions across. Here are a few examples of how to change lazy writing (adverbs) into a more skillful one:


Example 1: "I wonder if you would go out for dinner with me?" he asked shyly. 
"I wonder if you would go out for dinner with me?" he looked down.
"I wonder if you would go out for dinner with me?" he asked, playing with his car key.
He shuffled with his feet, then mumbled, "I wonder if you would go out for dinner with me?"
"I wonder if you would go out for dinner with me." Is he blushing? she thought, how cute!


Example 2: "Did you even listen?" she asked, angrily.
There was no point in hiding her anger. "Did you even listen?"
"Did you even listen?" her voice was full of anger.
"Did you even listen?" her question mirrored her anger.
"Did you even listen?" Wow, he thought, she really is angry.

Example 3: "Hey, it's not my fault," he replied, defensively.
"Hey, it's not my fault," he replied, holding up his hands (in defence).
He listened for a moment, then crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Hey, it's not my fault."
He shook his head and shrugged. "Hey, it's not my fault."

Of course those are just some examples. Emotions can be displayed by a lot of things. If a MC is sad, then they can cry, tears build up, spill over, shy people look down, away, shuffle their feet, hide their hands, bite their lips, play with something in their hands, stammer, etc. Angry people make fists, shake them, their voices change, their facial expression changes, their temples pulsate, etc.

I'm in no way saying adverbs done have a place in writing, and some just can't be replaced, but there are always ways around it. Each time when you are about to write one, try to play with the sentence and with the scene, you will be surprised how many you can actually swap for a much better description.

If you have some more examples, please feel free to add.

And no, it's not about angels

Just kidding!

If you're an indie author, exposure is everything. There are pretty brilliant and dedicated bloggers out there, who don't get tired promoting others. One of them is the wonderful, also published author, Catherine Chisnall, who has thrown some interview questions into my direction. About me, about my writing, about No Wings Attached, the charity and she even tickled some surprising facts out of me.
Please stop by her blog, take a look around and if you have time, you might want to read the interview with me :-)
I'm quite over the moon, No Wings Attached is doing all right. It's certainly a far cry from the success of Excuse me, where is the exit?, but it's getting there. I was a bit worried to throw the first book of the series out when the second isn't even finished yet, but I plan to publish the next one by October this year, readers have asked when it will come out, which makes me feeling all fussy again. My baby's loved :-)

On Melissa Kaplan's advice to challenge your iguana

Yes, this is another post about the green monster. While I'm sitting here to write this, he lies lazily on his bamboo shelf, where he has a good view over me. He really likes that. While I have covered all the other reflective surfaces, I left this one open, so he can also look outside the window. Iguanas get bored easily.

His aggression has become a little worse, I noticed mainly in the morning hours or just before he goes to sleep. During the day, he's rather relaxed as long as I don't come near. Looking him in the eye when I stand in front of the vivarium will be understood as me challenging him and he might jump to attack.

Which brings me to a website that is well known to most iguana owners. Unfortunately, many trust this advice too much and will probably learn their lesson the hard way: being attacked or even worse, severely bitten and end up in A&E (ER).

Melissa Kaplan advises to stand your ground with male aggressive iguanas or challenge them, by stomping your foot, climb onto something and shout at the animal, shaking your finger at them or even charge them first. That is not going to work! In fact this will make your iguana even more furious and he will attack. By that I mean, he will probably charge at you and sink his teeth into anything in his way, hand, leg, foot, shoe, towel, whatever available. And that's not enough, he will violently shake his head from left to right to definitely get a piece out of your body. Big aggressive iguanas in mating season are dangerous. They need to be treated with as much respect as possible and their owner has always to be on the lookout for signs of attack. Plus, they're incredibly bendy and fast.
I am one lucky girl to have a particularly aggressive exemplar. At six years old, he's big and strong and if I was to follow Melissa Kaplan's advice, I'd probably know each nurse and doctor by name in an A&E. She says she's carrying her iguana around for a bit. I have done it, just by putting him back into his vivarium, after taking him out in order to clean it, and he'd bend around so quickly, trying to bite into my face. Male iguanas don't care how big or loud you are, they will charge, no matter what. Brave little buggers.

I've been very lucky so far to not have suffered any major injuries handling aggressive iguanas. I had two in my career as an iguana carer (since '94). My current one, Zorro, presents aggressions on the high end of the scale and I would never let anyone near him. At this time of the year, which can last for a few months, I try to handle him as little as possible. Even if he's not in mating season, he's never really tame and I always have to watch what I'm doing, but he usually lets me touch or handle him as well as, sometimes, even give him a good head rub. But one wrong move or moment unattended and I end up with a very painful bite.

For those of you who are interested in keeping iguanas and are doing their 'homework' with an extensive research first, here are two websites that might be just what you're looking for:

Henry Lizardlover  He knows what he's doing, though I don't agree with those pictures he's taking and I also don't agree on the one video where he feeds his animals Swiss cheese. Iguanas should not be given any animal protein. But he has good advice on food, detailed information on behaviour and breeding issues, male and female.

Green Iguana Society  Another site that will answer questions about iguana behaviour, feeding, handling, etc.

Good news demand to be shared

I've received a few wonderful reviews and feedback for No Wings Attached. And that's not all; people have messaged me on twitter, contacted me on facebook or via e-mail, telling me how much they enjoyed the book. What surprises me the most is that a lot of men seem to really like it. They probably fancy the idea of wooing a women by making her wishes come true ;-)

Here's the newest review from amazon.com:

I read Stella's book last weekend and I enjoyed it. "No Wings Attached" is light-hearted and hopeful, but is not sappy. Although it doesn't get overly dramatic, it has enough tension to keep you moving through the reading at a nice clip.

Tom is sent to Celia as the result of a mistake he made as a wish consultant. He needs to make good the mistake and the sweet results of his making good is the plot of the book.

Celia and Tom read as real people and very believable. The author definitely has a handle on proper characterization of her H and h. You'll not want the book to end, I promise you.

I call "No Wings Attached" a good buy. You'll not regret the purchase. 

Here's one from Goodreads (by a man):

NO WINGS ATTACHED was fast paced and fun. Near the end, it had it's suspenseful moments, and a dramatic twist. I enjoyed getting both main characters first person points-of-view. 


No Wings Attached is available at the kindle store and smashwords. Please click on the picture to the right to read the first three chapters or find the links to all outlets.

A very short piece

In One Moment

 

I've written it to this rather beautiful song

You stand by the window, motionless. The sky presents a blue canvas for the tree in front of your house. Its trunk strong and reassuring, deeply woven roots snake into the ground for security. Proud and majestic arms stretch to all sides; you watch the ends sway in the slight breeze. One single tear makes its way down, following the contours of your pained smile. Briefly, you close your eyes. Sounds of chainsaws rip through the quiet into your thoughts. Fooled by the image of a healthy foundation, your hopes were high for it to stand a life time. With every branch falling, you feel the energy leaving; with every thud, you feel your heart has been robbed of a beat, with every drop of resin, another tear appears, forming a steady stream, with each crack, your soul cries out.

Eventually, when dawn paints a multi-coloured picture, the tree, which would make it worth looking at, is missing. Its life destroyed, piled into heaps next to a hollow trunk, like your beliefs, your trust and your hopes.

You stand by the window, motionless.