Touching a reader's heart is hard

At least I find it difficult. Anger, I can do, frustration I can do, humour is easy, but touching a reader's heart so that he or she actually reaches for tissues? That's damn hard work.
There aren't many books that made me cry, but movies, oh hell, movies do the job. Why? Because they have the violins to emphasise the sad situation. Same goes with thrillers or horror; the bass and high pitched sounds of the violin will have you sit at the edge of your seat.
As authors we have to paint the picture more clearly, we have to draw the reader in so he or she feels like the character, as if he or she is in the book or has the scenes forming a motion picture before their eyes. A tricky job. I admit I had my fights with dramatic scenes in both books, No Wings Attached and Candlelight Sinner, but according to my Beta readers I've managed in the latter. One said I had her reeling for a moment and the other one told me yesterday that she actually was in tears. She said it's amazing how much you can get attached to the characters and worry with and for them. Not that I like making my readers cry, but it made me a little proud.

I think the problem for me is that writing those sob-scenes means to lay open a part of me. To write them I need to feel them, to picture them, which means I have to be sad, too. Rather annoying if you are in a happy place, to be honest; just press the button and be sad. Doesn't work that way, I'm afraid. If I were able to do that, I'd probably be an actor. One reason, by the way, to refrain to even try being one.

Bringing tears to a reader's eye, for me, is the ultimate writing challenge. You need the action, the words, the facial expressions, the gestures. Everything counts.


Here's what I do:

She sat down and cried bitter tears. <-- does that make you feel sad, too? No? Me neither.
But:
She gasped, her eyes filled with moisture and her lower lip quivered. With one hand, she reached out to feel his pulse. Nothing. She couldn't feel anything. One tear rolled down her cheek, followed by another; until they build a steady stream. She didn't bother to wipe them away; instead she leaned forward and pressed her ear to his chest. "Please don't be dead, please don't leave me! I love you," she whispered desperately between her sobs. He lay still, the world -- her world  -- had stopped moving and only her weeps echoed through the room.

Okay, might be a bit over the top and I told you I'm not the best when it comes to dramatic scenes, but I'm getting better at it.

How do you write them? Do you find them easy to write or do you struggle, too?

How to inject emotions without looking like a beginner

A friend of mine recently forwarded a rejection letter he received for one of his books. The agent's reason was that the book lacked emotions, something I've been telling him for a while, but he didn't want to listen, so he learned the hard way.

I told him to get a huge syringe of emotions and inject it into the writing and scenes where needed. His answer was that he then would have to use adverbs a lot and he didn't want that. This got me thinking. Do writer really think that using adverbs are the only way to showcase emotions? Personally, I don't use them a lot and still manage to bring emotions across. Here are a few examples of how to change lazy writing (adverbs) into a more skillful one:


Example 1: "I wonder if you would go out for dinner with me?" he asked shyly. 
"I wonder if you would go out for dinner with me?" he looked down.
"I wonder if you would go out for dinner with me?" he asked, playing with his car key.
He shuffled with his feet, then mumbled, "I wonder if you would go out for dinner with me?"
"I wonder if you would go out for dinner with me." Is he blushing? she thought, how cute!


Example 2: "Did you even listen?" she asked, angrily.
There was no point in hiding her anger. "Did you even listen?"
"Did you even listen?" her voice was full of anger.
"Did you even listen?" her question mirrored her anger.
"Did you even listen?" Wow, he thought, she really is angry.

Example 3: "Hey, it's not my fault," he replied, defensively.
"Hey, it's not my fault," he replied, holding up his hands (in defence).
He listened for a moment, then crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Hey, it's not my fault."
He shook his head and shrugged. "Hey, it's not my fault."

Of course those are just some examples. Emotions can be displayed by a lot of things. If a MC is sad, then they can cry, tears build up, spill over, shy people look down, away, shuffle their feet, hide their hands, bite their lips, play with something in their hands, stammer, etc. Angry people make fists, shake them, their voices change, their facial expression changes, their temples pulsate, etc.

I'm in no way saying adverbs done have a place in writing, and some just can't be replaced, but there are always ways around it. Each time when you are about to write one, try to play with the sentence and with the scene, you will be surprised how many you can actually swap for a much better description.

If you have some more examples, please feel free to add.